set an example

“Nothing has a greater, longer lasting impression upon another person than the awareness that someone has transcended suffering, has transcended circumstance, and is embodying and expressing a value that inspires and ennobles and lifts life.”

...from  7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R Covey 

i hope that i offer such an example.  i encourage you to look at your circumstance in the same way.  MS is good for some things.  it's helps me to find the bright side.

happy new year!

here's to a year full of happy moments!

new thought to change

last time i managed to change my thoughts from angry to content.  i'm still practicing.  it's often easier said than done.

as i practice my mood changes, i'm making an even bigger change.  for years now, i've been praying for a strong, healthy body.  it finally dawned on me that while i am differently-able than typical humans, i AM a strong, healthy, able person!  this is a huge shift.  my prayers were answered long ago without my noticing.  i'm still looking forward to a miracle where MS is gone.  in the meantime, i will be spending more time focused on my current strong, healthy, able self.

wishing you thoughts that will change your world!

changing thoughts

Change your thoughts and you change your world. ...Norman Vincent Peale

this quote often confounds me, but tonight it worked!  i was crying over the 15th frustrating thing to happen to me.  i stopped for a second and asked myself, 'do i want to spend my time being angry or do i want to enjoy myself?'  the tears stopped abruptly and i looked at facebook to see how my friends are.  i've stopped to write this, then i've got bills to pay before i can look for more fun.  but the anger, frustration and sadness are gone!  at least for this moment my world feels okay, and living in the moment is what keeps me going.  i hope i can change my thoughts easily every time, but i think it will take practice.

give it a try!  see what you think.  best wishes and happy holidays!

tysabri, take 2

well, i'm disappointed. that extra energy i got from my 1st go around tysabri has not returned. three days after my initial dose in august of 2009, my energy was markedly better. i lost that when i switched to gilenya. now i've had 3 new doses and no benefit. is it slowing my progression? i hope so. it certainly isn't stopping it. but my neurologist agrees that tysabri is my best choice.

i try not to worry. i deal with each day as it comes, frustrating or not. i'm visualizing my fully able self.

i'm just starting to explore quantum physics. can i direct electrons from my source into the healthy version of me? it's worth a try. i'll keep you posted.

breathe

this song really spoke to me:

Breathe by Ryan Star

She's fine most of the time
She takes her days with a smile
Moves like a dancer in light
Spinning around to the sound
But sometimes she falls down

Breathe, just breathe
Take the world off your shoulders and put it on me
Breathe, just breathe
Let the life that you live be all that you need

Let go of our fear, let go of our doubt
Let go of the ones who try to put you down
You're gonna be fine, don't hold it inside
If you hurt right now then let it all come out

i try to do this often. i sit still, breathe and remind myself to enjoy or appreciate the moment. of course, some moments are awful. in those i remind myself things will eventually be okay. that is after i've cried and yelled to let the pressure release. as bad as things get, i do find ways to comfort myself and figure out how to deal with the next frustration.

the best thing to remember is to breathe.

back to tysabri

well, the long awaited oral disease-modifying drug, gilenya, fell short for me. it is supposed to slow down MS progression. it may have slowed things but i've still felt slightly worsening symptoms.

i felt progression on tysabri as well, but it gave me a great benefit. from the 1st dose i had a healthy amount of energy. i was able to do 3 days of activities and feel fine after a good night's rest. it's been years since i could do that! even in the early years just after diagnosis, i would have to rest a full day after most activities; for instance, visiting a friend out of town. i was much more active then at 23 years. it was a noticeable difference though. i needed more recuperation than my pre-MS years. now, along came tysabri and my stamina was great! i had hoped gilenya might be better, but i'm back to needing to rest a full day after being out and about.

i really miss the energy boost i got from tysabri, so i'm going again. the monthly stick of the i.v. is not fun, but it was worth the benefits. so gilenya will go by the wayside. i'll have to wait a month between drugs. also, they're doing a study looking for some virus that many of us carry around without knowing. if i have it we can still go forward with caution. if i don't have it i'll know tysabri is less risky for me.

medicine is often a necessary evil. so we must be knowledgable about the drugs and about the way our body reacts to them. wish me luck! good luck to you too!