MS really stinks!

MS really stinks! (imagine harsher language)

Yes, it is what it is, but this "is" is infuriating! Yes, if I concentrate more on "who I really am" I know that I am not my body. I am aware that I am an individuation of God. This experience is as valuable as any other.

But that doesn't help me move my body the way I want. It doesn't help me do the things I want; the little everyday things I need to do.

Thank you, God, that I can write about what I'm feeling and let the anger ease away.

Thank you, friends, for listening.

loved

So I've been reading about publishing books. The first bit of advice is to build an online presence and start talking about the book. So I'm going to share a little at a time and see what you think. Title: Finding Our Light.

"I was given a gift from the day I was born, throughout my childhood and continuing to the present day. I was given love. I have felt loved as far back as I can remember. I didn't realize what a gift it was."

Do you feel loved? I hope so. If you're alone, listen to your conscience – if you're quiet, it will tell you that you are special and important and lovable. Listen carefully.

optimism

Can optimism be learned?

I'm writing my memoir in the hopes of spreading the idea that life can be good despite adversity. My story of MS may be sad, I'm  certainly sad sometimes, but my life is truly wonderful. I have many loved ones. I have activities I enjoy. I have a wonderful place to live and money to pay for the things I need. My health is not average, but it is manageable. I look forward to every day.

It does take effort to look for the bright side in every situation. It can take some imagination. For me, the effort is worth it. Finding a way to enjoy my moments, no matter what they involve, is so much better than spending my time feeling sad, angry or sorry for myself.

Yet, I have met people who don't seem to have any other way of looking at life besides seeing misery. They see it and can think of nothing else. I see misery also, but I try to make that a very small part of my thoughts. I have tried to help some sad people find a brighter outlook, but I have rarely succeeded.

Can I teach optimism? My goal is to express it and hope that others gain something.

Are you able to look on the bright side? I wish you success in doing so.

YOU

You are light and love. This is what I try to remember when I'm having a hard time.

I practice every day before I even get into a difficult spot. I'm reiterating some of what I have learned from Eckhart Tolle. I sit still. I sense what is around me: the way the air feels, the sounds that I hear. I usually need to keep my eyes closed because visual stimulus keeps my mind busy. I acknowledge that the world around me is created by the way I see it. I appreciate the good and the bad because I am learning from all of it.

Next is the most important part. I step outside my mind, outside of Liesl. I feel myself as part of the one being from which we all come. I picture myself as warm, white light without form. That light is loving energy. I let myself feel surrounded by my own light and love which is the same light and love that comes from God.

 
I practice that feeling every day for just a couple of minutes, so that when I'm feeling negatively about myself or my circumstances I can go to that place of light and love. Even if I don't feel better in that moment, I know that I will be okay eventually.

I encourage you to develop this feeling of light and love which is YOU. It is always there when you need it.

Why me? What's next?

I always encourage people not to ask, "Why me?" There is no answer.

And what if there was an answer? Why me? I did something wrong. I didn't do something I should have. Someone did something to me. I'm getting paid back for something I did to someone else. Are any of those answers useful? No. You can't change the past. Putting blame somewhere doesn't solve the problem.

When I was diagnosed with MS, my doctor told me to quit smoking. All doctors tell you to quit smoking. Unfortunately, no one explained at the time (I don't think it was known) that smoking could make MS worse. Had I known, I hope I would have quit on the spot. But I can't go back.

It only makes sense to me to ask, "What's next?" What can I do to move forward? How can I make this problem be useful? Can I learn something? Can I then teach what I've learned?

And there is a very new idea that has been brought to my attention. I have read and heard people say that our soul chooses the journey we will have before we are born. Ugh. If that's the case, I'm not thrilled with my choice. At least that's what I thought when I first encountered this idea. Now, I see that it was an interesting journey to choose. It's an incredible learning experience that I never would have had without my disability. That said, I hope that my journey includes finding a way to heal the damage that has been done by multiple sclerosis.

What do you think about that? Can you imagine that your soul chose the life that you are leading?
Whether or not we had any choice in our circumstances, to be happiest we must find a way to live with what we have just as it is. So, please try not to ask, "Why me?" Instead, ask yourself, "What can I do to make the best of the situation?" The answer will be much more useful.

nothing is wrong

Here is a thought from Neale Donald Walsh:
Nothing is wrong. Every experience or trial is here to help me learn who I am and give opportunities to demonstrate myself; to give others my abundant qualities.

That is a pretty profound thought. Things go wrong all the time, right? Well, Neale says no. Life happens. The things that we feel are wrong are simply things that need to be seen in a different light.

Multiple sclerosis is one of those things for me. I am trying to see it in a new way. This disease is giving me a unique experience. It is teaching me a lot. I might want to argue because I don't like what I see – it must be wrong. Okay, maybe not. It is helping me learn about myself and be brave enough to share my experience with others. It is also the main reason I pursue spirituality. I'm looking for comfort and support. I have found that in God and the spiritual world generally.

I'm changing another word, also. A friend pointed out that by using the phrase MY MS I'm expressing ownership. I will be much happier to claim ownership of MY MIRACLE when it occurs.

So, I'm changing the words "struggle" to "experience" and "my" to "this." MS is no longer my struggle, my suffering. MS is this disease that I am dealing with right now. This MS is an experience that has given me quite a lot, and I look forward to the day this MS is simply a memory.

Change your thoughts and you change your world. – Norman Vincent Peale
It is no small task to change your thoughts, but it is amazing how your world changes when you are able to see it in a different light.

health is wealth

It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold or silver. ~Mahatma Gandhi

As a person with multiple sclerosis, I completely agree with this quote. Every day that I feel healthy is infinitely more valuable than any money I could save. Often, we take our health for granted. We are used to doing things as we please. Usually, it's not until we have a problem with our health that we realize what a gift it is.

How are you today? Feeling healthy? Take advantage and do something that makes you happy. The things you do today will create memories which will last throughout your life no matter what your finances or your health.

But don't let this worry you about health problems you don't have. You never know what the future holds. You have today. Do everything you can to enjoy it!